The civil war between North and South Vietnam had been going on since the 1950s. America’s increasingly deep and costly involvement in that conflict led to another civil war of sorts on our own shores. Those who supported the war and the government that pursued it clashed verbally and sometimes physically with those who were anti-war, anti-government or both. Families and communities were divided, with splits that sometimes took a generation or more to heal. Indeed, despite all the analysis and the soul-searching that has gone on in the intervening years, many Americans still disagree on the necessity, justice, and cost of the Vietnam War.
The third of these civil wars, metaphorically speaking, was the surging conflict over civil rights that exploded in the 1960s. That had been going on since the 19th century, and events including the Rodney King riots and the emergence of the Black Lives Matter movement suggest that it continues to this day.
These three roiling conflicts were the intense cultural and emotional backdrop against which I came of age. I didn’t consciously choose to be part of any of them, yet I was touched by all three to a greater or lesser extent.
Along the way, they engaged me in a fourth civil war: an inner battle, a war between my own conflicting expectations and beliefs.
This is the story of that inner battle…of the life and times that gave rise to it…and of the forces, often mysterious or unseen, which kept me whole and helped me find my way to peace.